Car Show, Sideshow, Shitty Show Shimmy Sham

Oops, I think I missed a week in there! Karissa's got a couple ads up for her cleaning business, so we're eagerly awaiting any bites. It would be nice to just do massive advertising, but we don't have the means other businesses do. Luckily her boyfriend is a guerilla advertiser and is willing to help get the word out (as soon as they're printed, anyway).
We spent last saturday with Amber & Ben out behind their house. I'd never seen their fence before (I obviously didn't help build it), but it looks professionally done (that means good job, Ben, Kevin, Butto, and whoever else helped).
Last night I took Derek to Culver's, where every week a bunch of car guys park their classics & talk shop. We got to meet an auto tech teacher from Red River high who must have been somewhat popular in this circle, because quite a few people knew his name. Derek would probably keel over reading that this, but the car the guy pulled up in looked like a giant hotdog bun. It was built back in 1948 by a then-16-year-old, who later went on to enhance it for a Masters' thesis (in exactly what I didn't really pay attention to). The engine was from an old Mercury police car that was totalled in a previous accident (yeah Derek I at least caught that part).

What am I watching?

Dark Ride- Some college kids on Spring Break check out a re-opening carnival ride with a horrific past. At the same time, the serial killer that once dwelt within the ride escapes from his asylum and gets himself a sense of nostalgia. The acting is mediocre, and the 'girlfriend' is a huge bitch--I know, there's a backstory of the 'boyfriend' possibly cheating on her, but whatever. She's still a bitch. I don't care. Anyway, Patrick Renna s in this. Who the hell is Patrick Renna, you ask? Well, despite the fact that he's been pretty busy for the last 20 years acting, he's not terribly well-known except as the chubby kid, "Ham" from The Sandlot. His acting was actually pretty good, and the plot twist, though not really surprising, was pretty satisfiying. Unfortunately, I'm betting there'll be a sequel.

Varietease- 1954 film replicating Burlesque shows of years before. It says Bettie Page stars, but I only saw her in the first part of the show. The other dancers were so-so and didn't get naked. Lily St. Cyr came on last and seemed more like the main attraction, rightly so since she showed less and danced more provocatively. Seeing the last 1o minutes would have been better than having to watch the whole thing.

What About Bob?- A "multiphobic personality in a constant state of panic" leeches onto a psychiatrist whose book is just starting to take off. He gets along great with the "fam", much to the doctor's chagrin. While Bob gets better, the doctor gets worse. I saw this back when it was a new release, and a couple more times since. It's somewhat formulaic, very funny, but the ending is the best part--the protagonist & antagonist do not reconcile like in most comedies, even though Bob nevertheless becomes part of the beloved "fam". I wonder how many psychiatrists would actually side with Dr. Marvin on the issue of imposing patients, especially having one of those patients with you on Good Morning America?

Uncle Buck- After a woman's father has a heart attack, her husband is forced to call upon his shiftless gambling-addicted brother to come and watch the kids so they can go back to her hometown. Jean Louisa Kelly looks a bit old for her part of the 15-year-old daughter, but she plays the bitchy, say-anything-no-matter-how-hurtful teen very well, and John Candy & McCauley Culkin are in their prime (actually, 1989 was a pretty good year for movies). I've seen this movie more than a dozen times, and I still like it.
Mr. Jingles- Serial killer clown makes a supernatural comeback via self-spoken incantation. The synopsis on the cover said it was a sequel to S.I.C.K. (whose summary sounded better and less deceiving). The acting sucks, the special effects REALLY suck, and the clown isn't really scary. Watch Killer Clowns From Outer Space or The Clown At Midnight and you'll see some creepy shit. This was just not worth the effort I put into watching it. My attention started wandering not even halfway through and I got more action out of the crossword puzzle. Yes, there was some nudity, no, it didn't help.
She-Freak- A frustrated waitress starts her life over working at a carnival. She marries the boss, has an affair with the strong man which leads to the boss's death, and the freaks of the ten-in-one get their revenge. Sound familar? Except for a few character switcharoos (that's right I said it), this is pretty much a modernized version of Todd Browning's Freaks. The acting ain't half-bad, at least. Overall, it was okay, but didn't have nearly the substance or storytelling abilities Todd Browning brought to his. Th DVD I watched came with a neat little Sideshow short.

To the Movies! And Pork!

We went to Kevin & April's on Thursday for a little outdoor grilling. I loved getting to eat outside, that's one of my favorite things about grilling out. The mosquitos & bees were well-worth it, and Kevin's custom barbecue sauce was awesome on his pulled pork. Oh wait, does that sound dirty?
A new page of Golden Brown is out as usual, hopefully will be wrapping up soon. The action is picking up again.
I finally got to see the Dark Knight! I was worried the van would die again, the result of some cosmic force fucking with with me and trying to keep me from seeing the movie, but NO! And we had enough on my gift certificate left to get us admission and some nice super-buttered popcorn. I didn't feel very good that night, and it was totally worth it. See below for my review, stupid.
What have I been watching?
Drillbit Taylor- A trio of high school nerds hire a veteran bodyguard to help them with some vicious school bullies. They eventually realize he's just a bum telling stories. There's a returning trend of using actors pretty close to the age of the characters, and geeky ones to boot. I like that. A little tidbit on the bullies: Filkins is played by Alex Frost, who starred in Gus Van Sant's Elephant as a bullied kid who goes on a killing spree at his school. Ronnie is played by Josh Peck, who used to be on a Nickelodeon show called Drake and Josh in which he played a huge nerd. Ironic, huh?
21- MIT student is convinced by his conniving Nonlinear Equations professor to use his superior number skills in Vegas counting cards. Dialogue isn't great, action sequences aren't great except when someone's getting beat up. It looks like a Steve Bochko show.
Johnny Cash: The Man, His World, His Music- Home footage intermingled with concert footage, also his wanderings into his woods. I thought it was neat to see what his concerts were like. I always used to hope he'd make one more trip up north for a concert, even if it was in Minneapolis, but even before his death you could tell he was pretty much done doing the national tour thing. It also made me realize that although Joaquin Pheonix managed to sound like Johnny Cash, he really looks nothing like the Man in Black. Oh well.
Bad Acid: It's Worth the Trip!- An acid freak with his own underground metal radio show drops acid & goes on various misadventures trying to get to and from work. This is made by Bill Zebub, the same guy who made The Worst Horror Film Ever Made. Fortunately, this one was put together a little better, and very fortunately features a cameo by noneother than Pete Steele from Type O. In one part Bill throws a DJ out for playing Metallica while covering his shift, but we're assured in the end credits that no insult was actually meant by it, since Zebub's show was to exclusively promote underground metal (although I don't know how underground Type O Negative is these days). The tripping scenes looked well-acted and natural--I wonder how 'acted' they were?
The Dark Knight- Batman takes on the Gotham mafia, the Joker, and briefly Two-Face. Even despite the hype I was pleasantly blown away by how well this movie turned out. This movie and Batman Begins, in reality are not at all faithful to the comic. Everything has been rewritten. But as far as rewrites go, this one was written better than any comic movie I've seen. The characters have substance to them, and despite the visual attraction of Batman and his gadgets, your can take your eyes off him to focus on the non-hero characters. Speaking of which, the topic of 'hero' pops up, and it is here that Batman officially declares that he is not a hero. He realizes that he has to be regarded as a vigilante and even a villian to get things done. Heath Ledger did an excellent job as the Joker, and deserves any posthumous award he gets. This Joker fits the attitude of the one in the comics the best. He's completely amoral, sadistic, chaotic, and funny. He plans his crimes meticulously, then blows everything up just for the fun of it, even money. He's got plany of stories for how he got his scars, and Nolan (director) wisely opted not to show his real origin. Aaron Eckhardt did an awesome job as Harvey Dent. He looks like the handsome upright type of DA the comics had in mind, and after his disfigurement (the burn is a little closer to the animated series than the comics) he cuts the character of Two-Face perfectly. Whatever CGI was used on the burn side was not overdone or fake-looking, and all the plot development that led up to it was written in well enough that you didn't guess every little step. His struggle with his own volatile duality gives me much respect for Eckhardt, as well as every other cast member. Two things disappoint me. First, all the attention Ledger got was fine and all, but overshadowed how great the rest of the cast was. It's redeemed when you see the movie, but the media really tries to lead people to believe that Ledger is the only important character in the movie, even to the point of forgetting Bale's role. The second thing was killing off Two-Face. Why? Why did they do that? He had so much more pontential as a character. Even Scarecrow got a little part in this one, so Two-Face could easily have have shown up in the third movie (believe me there'll be a third), even if in a supporting character. I am glad the Joker wasn't killed off, though. And I LOVED the pencil trick. A perfect example of that wrong kind of funny you almost feel disturbed for laughing at.

Will I Ever See It?

What a week! I've been kept from seeing the new Batman movie for two weeks now. We were going to drop Isabella off at daycare two fridays ago to go see it, then she threw a big tantrum and had to stay home, which meant we had to, too. The next day she got sick, so we hung around the house all day. Then it seemed like we had an appointment for each day of the week--that coupled with her swim lessons fucked my sleep schedule up so I was tired and cranky all last week. By the next saturday, I was ready to see the movie. We got as far as Little Keepers, and then the van died. I knew it was having alternator trouble, but that trouble accelerated quickly and killed our car halfway out of the parking space. After getting it towed next door, we barely managed to reach Rent-King before it closed and snagged ourselves a piece of shit Ford Taurus that looked like something my mom would drive. By now, we had barely 2 hours left and the movie idea was a wash. We decided to go to Target to get some stuff, and at the checkout, the cashier guy asked me if I'd seen the Dark Knight. I said "not yet," and he told me "yeah, you HAVE to see it, dude...seriously, if you don't go watch it, I'll come find you..." If I hadn't just been royally fucked out of seeing it, I would have laughed and agreed "you bet yer ass I'm gonna see it!", but no I really wanted to fucking punch the guy. So all you guys who got to see it, I'm happy for you and all, but don't tell me how much you loved it unless you want to get hurt.
Anyway, on Monday night it rained from hell. I had just got done with my beginning shift paperwork around 12:30, and decided to open up one of our downstairs meeting rooms just in case the weather got worse. As soon as I got down there, I could hear water running in one of the rooms, so I checked it out, and sure enough, water was pouring in under the emergency door. I went to the windows to see how bad it was getting, and couldn't even see the concrete steps leading up to the ditch. I ran outside with a stick to see if I could poke around and find the pump we keep there. Couldn't find it, so I got som towels and jammed them into the door as best I could. It didn't work at all, and soon I could hear more water. I looked up to see that two of the windows running along that wall were badly sealed and letting in little waterfalls. I couldn't believe the water had actually risen up to the windows! Finally I called our manager, who called our owner. While I waited for them, I tried bailing out some of the water from the ditch to relieve pressure on the windows. I was standing knee-deep in water about 6 feet from a tree, and lightning was still jumping around overhead. We found an extra pump, the water finally lowered (most of it already inside), and afterward, we spent almost 4 hours cleaning and drying carpets.
The next night, I had a slight domestic dispute at the motel, but luckily it wasn't anything loud, and it didn't end with me cleaning carpets.
What am I Watching?
2000 Maniacs!- The southern town of Pleasant Valley holds it's Centennial (oddly enough starting from 1864). They set up a fake detour to lure traveling Northerners to their town, and procede to cut, quarter, and smash them in ritualistic revenge. The opening song "The South's Gonna Rise Again" is oddly magnetic and held my attention for the entire opening sequence. My favorite kill? Either the "boulder dunk" or the "spiky barrel roll". The ending was great--supernatural elements, and no one was willing to explain them, which turned out to be better for the movie. What was missing? Guns. Lots and lots of guns being fired off for no reason at all.
2001 Maniacs- Retelling of the 1964 original. They changed the opening song, thy should have stuck with the original. There was a cool updated homage to Deliverance when one of the annoying college guys gets out his guitar and starts jamming with a hillbilly kid playing on a resonator guitar. Acting was subpar, which is normal for these movies. Robert Egelund (Freddy Kreuger), as always, made a creepy character as the one-eyed mayor of Pleasant Valley. I didn't like how far the director went to show how "hillbilly" they were, though. Jokes about making out with cousins, overpolite southern hospitality, rebel yells everywhere--there was even a guy chasing a sheep around throughout the movie, obviously forgetting that it was a Montana joke. The ending was decent, though. My kind of ending for a movie.
Little Children- Picture Desperate Housewives with nudity, sex, and a recently released pedophile thrown into the mix. Bad marriages, affairs, paranoia, anger. Bunches of emotions in this movie. The narrator made me feel like I was watching a kid's fantasy movie. I almost didn't even recognize Jennifer Connely. Jackie Earle Haley took his hateful pedophile role to a whole new level. There are no disturbing scenes with children or anything, he just makes the character thoroughly creepy. In one scene, he is on a blind date his mother coaxed him to go on. As the woman is confiding in him that she's had a bad history with dating, he proceeds to masturbate in her car, threatening her and leaving her horrified. Interesting tidbit- Jackie Earle Haley, who revived his acting career after a decade or so of limo-driving and pizza delivery with Little Children, is set to play Rorshach, my favorite character from the Watchmen. I hope he does it justice.